“And when you fast, be not as the hypocrites, sad. For they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Amen I say to you, they have received their reward. But thou, when thou fastest anoint thy head, and wash thy face; that thou appear not to men to fast, but to thy Father who is in secret: and thy Father who seeth in secret, will repay thee. Lay not up to yourselves treasures on earth: where the rust, and moth consume, and where thieves break through and steal. But lay up to yourselves treasures in heaven: where neither the rust nor moth doth consume, and where thieves do not break through, nor steal. For where thy treasure is, there thy heart is also.”
Fasting and self-discipline are a part of loving yourself, because in building a strong will and mind, you feast on spiritual goods that bring you out of worldly love. However, fasting and sackcloth were signs of repentance that some in turn used to appear holy and devout, and the good wheat of fasting was sown alongside the weeds of vanity: “But while men were asleep,” that is, not being vigilant and guarding the purity of love, “his enemy came and oversowed cockle among the wheat and went his way” (Matthew 13:25). Instead of being overwhelmed with gloom due to affliction, whether from discipline or what is happening to you in life, realize the value of redemptive suffering: “Who now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up those things that are wanting of the sufferings of Christ, in my flesh, for his body, which is the church” (Colossians 1:24). You possess the heart of God, you have found love, and nothing can take this love from you: “These things I have spoken to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you shall have distress: but have confidence, I have overcome the world” (John 16:33). Feast on joy and love, even when the cross is heavy, for in this you will hide your cross with flowers, and can still make those around you feel loved while building up the treasure of love mystically. It has been said before that in suffering, you are in union with Christ crucified, when your hearts are one and you bear your trials in love, peace, and joy, you are consummating love: “It is consummated” (John 19:30); “Amen I say to thee,” o one suffering with Me, “this day thou shalt be with me in paradise” (Luke 23:43), and joining in the work of the salvation of the world: “For unto this are you called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving you an example that you should follow his steps” (1 Peter 2:21). To hide your crosses under a radiant love and joy is a love fully alive, that is not overcome by the bitter herbs that are fed to you: “He hath filled me with bitterness, he hath inebriated me with wormwood” (Lamentations 3:15); “Rejoice in the Lord always; again, I say rejoice” (Philippians 4:4). Your Father sees your trials, your difficulties, the little things you do for love that are unseen, and prizes each one highly: “There is a boy here that hath five barley loaves, and two fishes; but what are these among so many? …And Jesus took the loaves: and when he had given thanks, he distributed to them that were set down” (John 6:9-11). This may also apply to the departure from worldly things or vice, for this is a movement towards love, not arbitrarily away from the things onto which you have held: “Come, eat my bread, and drink the wine which I have mingled for you. Forsake childishness, and live, and walk by the ways of prudence” (Proverbs 9:5-6). In departing from what defined you previously, you find yourself in God, that the full expression of your love may come forward, not hidden by the treasures of this life. In grasping at what fades, you lose out on love, which is eternal: “Love never falleth away” (1 Corinthians 13:8). What fills your heart, Theophila? You can see in your conversation: “Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45). Is it matters of the world, is it things, is it yourself, or is it the Beloved? “Only let your conversation be worthy of the gospel of Christ” (Philippians 1:27); “But our conversation is in heaven; from whence also we look for the Saviour, our Lord Jesus Christ” (Philippians 3:20). Ah, how little people today love Love! “If thou didst know the gift of God” (John 4:10), life would be covered in the flowers of love, no matter the crosses that weigh upon the shoulders: “The flowers have appeared in our land, the time of pruning is come” (Song 2:13); “Take up my yoke upon you, and learn from me… For my yoke is sweet and my burden light” (Matthew 11:29-30). Climb up to grasp your treasure, claim the Sacred Heart with love, for He cannot resist a heart that looks sincerely for Him: “Turn away thy eyes from me, for they have made me flee away” (Song 6:4). Store up the treasure of love in the heaven that is God, simply love God: “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with thy whole heart, and with thy whole soul, and with thy whole strength” (Deuteronomy 6:5) because He loves you in the same way; you are His treasure, you are where His heart is: “My beloved to me, and I to him” (Song 2:16). Give Him your heart, and “I will give thee hidden treasures, and the concealed riches of secret places” (Isaias 45:3), the true treasure of the heart, the treasure of infinite, perfect love. This in turn leads to joy in all things, for the fruit of the Holy Spirit is love, which leads to “joy, peace, patience, benignity, goodness, longanimity, mildness, faith, modesty, continency, chastity” (Galatians 5:22), and nothing can overcome it: “They shall fight against thee, and shall not prevail: for I am with thee, saith the Lord, to deliver thee” (Jeremias 1:19).